After eight days at the Olympics, Canadians now have 3 Olympic medals. And a lot of journalists and wags seem to be really upset. I don’t see why. No, not at all. Canadians, like dolphins, are not the winners. We are not the victors. We are not the conquerors.

I can’t read a newspaper or turn on CBC without hearing somebody complaining. It’s the athletes’ fault. They just don’t want it bad enough. It’s the coaches’ fault. They’re just not pushing the athletes hard enough. It’s CBC’s fault. With their mandate to keep the cameras on the lackluster Canadians, we look like much bigger losers than we are. It’s the government’s fault. We just don’t invest in our athletes as much as we should. It’s the country’s fault. We just don’t support our team as much as we should like other countries do. It’s my fault. For touching myself at night.

I’ve never noticed this medal-mania before. What the hell happened? When did Canada become so competitive? I don’t like it and I don’t get it and I don’t want it.

Make no mistake. I love Canada. I love being a Canadian. I am proud of being a Canadian. We get most of the benefits of America without all the icky politics, or the mongering, strong-arming, and posturing. And, until recently, what was cool about being Canadian was the easy, relaxed way we got on, without the need to rush brashly through with bloody bayonets and big sticks or the need to pump our fists after winning the race.

I love our tortoise nature. Not meek. Not dumb. Not even slow-footed or slow-witted. The 2002 Winter games showed Canada the way I thought we were. When we lost, yes, even when we should have won, we smiled and said, oh well. What are you going to do? True, it doesn’t hurt that Jamie and David got the gold after all, but for me, it was the happy losing attitude I loved the most. We lost. We did our best. We are proud of ourselves.

Since the summer Olympics this past week, I haven’t seen much of that. I understand that in ancient Greece, it was all about the winner. The ancient Greeks might have been the first to believe that being second was the first to lose. That was a long time ago. And Canada, happily, is not ancient Greece.

Canadians need to leave Canada alone. I don’t want to be a nation of tortoises wishing we were hares. I don’t want to be measured by our medals. All that glisters, after all, isn’t gold or even silver or bronze. It was the lead can. It was always the lead can. There is still pride – or there ought to be – in doing our best. This is not the rally cry of a nation of losers. It’s the rally cry of a nation that doesn’t measure itself that way and doesn’t want to.

Podium schmodium.

SS