Attn: Ingram Frizer,
Programming Director, Brink of the Abyss Entertainment Productions

I’m very excited about this project and of course I am thrilled you are interested in my initial proposal. As requested, I outline what I will need below:

Space

• An open concept warehouse space of at least 2400’ square
  

Human Resources

• 4 gaffers
  
• 6 boom operators
  
• 10 certified trainers
  
• 50 feeders
  
• 3 IT staff
  
• 20 cleaning staff
  

Technology

• Confirmation of the web domain 1000monkeys
  
• Configuration of blog for 1000 authors
  
• 16 cameras
  
• 10 microphones
  
• 20 web cams
  
• 1000 remotely operated keyboards
  
• 1500 ankle chains
  
• 20,000 monkey diapers
  

Disposable Resources

• Bananas, sweet potatoes, carrots, and apples
  
• Soy
  
• Water
  
• All Purpose Monkey Chow
  

Animal Resources

• 1000 monkeys – a mix of Capuchin, Vervet, and Red-tailed
  
• 100 alternates
  

And, of course, the authoritative and complete works of Shakespeare. Have you got word back from A&E yet? I’ve got my fingers crossed.

SS